It’s Valentine’s Day weekend (aka the time of year when 90% of dating couples get engaged).

I thought it appropriate to ponder the question of what makes a happy marriage. And with any big question in life, I turn to the people I love and respect most. My family.

You should know (and probably already do if you are a regular reader) that my family is…a little different. We’re not buttoned up, reserved and quiet. We are quite the opposite. Loud, opinionated, intrusive (in the most loving way possible) and effing hilarious.

We are also all VERY different from one another. Kind of like snowflakes. Really awesome and dysfunctional snowflakes.

I put out a call to action to my family and MOST sent me vids in hours. Those of you who didn’t are assholes and cut out of the will when I make it big. The direction I gave was to be real and skip the cliche bullshit, like “never go to bed angry.” Because you know what? I think it’s normal and healthy to maybe go to bed just a little pissed off sometimes. We are all human and a genuine apology the morning after is better than a forced one before your head hits the pillow just because we’ve been trained to think that way.

So, without further adieu, here is advice from my family on how to have a happy marriage!

  1. These are my cousins Nadine and Jared. They are THE couple from my post, My Big Fat Brooklyn Dumbo Loft Wedding. They are “newlyweds” so to speak, and offer a fresh (and fizzy) perspective on the matter.

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Nadine and Jared advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

2. These are my cousins Karyn and Jeff. Karyn was my older female cousin in a sea of male beast cousins who tortured the shit out of me growing up for their own amusement. I idolized her but now she looks up to me….literally, because she’s the only adult in my family I am taller than and I’m just over 5ft tall.


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Karyn and Jeff advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

3. Next up are my cousins Gary and Alison. Gary actually did two vids and they were both so great and SO him, that I had to use both. Bless your heart Alison!

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Alison advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

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Gary advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

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Gary more advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

4. Pay attention to this next couple because they’ve been married for 50 years! My Aunt Sharon (my mother’s middle sister and also Gary’s mother) and Uncle Tony started dating in high school. My mom was 8 when they started courting and literally used to go on dates with them, frequently sitting in between them at the drive through. Talk about the original cockblocker.
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Aunt Sharon’s advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

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Uncle Tony’s advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

5. And of course it wouldn’t be a family video round-up without my parents. This blog is filled with my mother’s antics. For good reason. She and Bob, or as my child dubbed him, Paca, because she couldn’t say Grandpa, were high school sweethearts. They reconnected after they both divorced and have been married for a decade already. Time flies when you are having fun!

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Bob’s advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

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Mom advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.

P.S. I’m already failing one of my mom’s cardinal rules, because this is what my husband is currently looking at and I can assure you it is NOT fly. It’s downright unfly. But the coconut oil in my hair makes it pretty and the mask on my face diminishes wrinkles. I turn 39 next weekend and am trying desperately not to look like it.


6. And lasties not leasties, some advice from me and Jason aka SLS. This is a second marriage for both of us and we are also newlyweds, celebrating our first year of wedded bliss this coming April.

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So there you have it. Some gems from my family to yours!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Rachel and Jason advice from Rachel Sobel on Vimeo.