(As seen on Suburban Misfit Mom)

Screen Shot 2016-01-14 at 1.22.32 PM

Some people have a hard time understanding exactly what I do. They can’t wrap their head around the life of a momblogger. Particularly people who spend their time chained to a cubicle, drinking subpar coffee and eating pastries left over from the 9am sales meeting (Been there, done that).

So, I decided to paint a little picture of a day in the life. My life, specifically.

While there was a dramatic shift in my professional life as I abandoned a full-time “real” job (and a steady paycheck) to write/blog full-time, contrary to what some think…I DO actually work. And even amidst the regular interruptions of life, including picking up a sick (or faking sick to be home with mama) child, or dropping off the toy she forgot for fun friday, or picking up drycleaning my husband couldn’t get to, or doing 13 loads of laundry…I manage to churn out A LOT of writing.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and it’s totally true. But you know what gets a point across even more than a picture??? A GIF (Mom, that’s basically a moving picture…because I know she’s going to ask). Those little animated gems pop up everywhere and spread through social media quicker than Paris Hilton’s entire music career.

paris

Truth be told, the life of a momblogger is not very glamorous. At least mine isn’t (am I doing something wrong?!) From getting a child dressed, fed and out to door to getting some form of dinner on the table in the evening, it can be a downright shitshow. But it’s my shitshow.

I can’t be alone, right? Mombloggers, holler if ya hear me!

holler

Who needs an alarm clock when you can have your eyes manually pried open at 6am by your spawn as she simultaneously asks if you’re up?

alarm clock

Then, before I start getting bossed around, I need caffeine or I will lose my shit.

coffee

Once I feel human it’s time to get my child, who has a VERY strong mind of her own, dressed for school. P.S. She wears a uniform and still manages to put me through the ringer!

dressed

I haven’t even brushed my teeth and I think I might only have one contact lens in, but I need to make lunch, and fast. My daughter is also a picky eater, so if I want her to actually consume her lunch, it needs to be perfect to meet her standards.

idiot sandwich

While she’s contained at the breakfast table, I have 30 seconds to throw something on my body so that the school administrators don’t think I am homeless when I walk her in.

mom dressed

Make it out the door, holding everything, including her backpack. It’s like I somehow sprout extra arms in an instant. And we’re off.

swagger

Get back home in time to hop on the treadmill so that the bags of cheezits I had for breakfast, as I’m trying to get everyone else ready, don’t catch up with me.

treadmill

And now it’s time for me to actually get some writing in.

writing

Oh, but wait…don’t get too comfortable because school just called and my kid is sick and needs to come home.

ugly cry

Get her back. Get refocused. Bang out some blogs. Talk to some advertisers/partners. RSVP to some events. And now we’re finally in a groove.

pow

Until I realize, it’s time to think about dinner. Shit. Can’t we order pizza like we did the last 14 times?

chef

Finally, everyone is fed and I can have a glass of wine

wine

And then folks, we end the day almost exactly as it started, but replace getting out the door with getting a kid into bed and replace the school uniform with PJs.

sleep

Then I shove dinner in my mouth. I don’t even fucking care what I’m eating. I just need sustenance.

eating

Finally, it’s bedtime for ME. Which won’t last long because it’s only a matter of time until my child wakes up for the 1st of 5 times throughout the night.

tired

And then, just like clockwork, it’s a new day…but it’s the same shit. It’s like Groundhog Day up in here.

groundhog day

Stay strong fellow mamas…we can do this…I think…

stay strong